Thursday, December 7, 2017

(316) *ovaries exploding indistinctly* + links

By Sati. Thursday, December 7, 2017 17 Comments
  • I'm continuing my insane quest. On Friday (and on Wednesday) I rewatched The Wolf of Wall Street (livetweet - 1,2,3) which is one of my favorite films of all time. The script of that thing is amazing. The film is so funny, obviously the ludes scene had me on the floor laughing but the confrontation in the parking lot with Jon and Jonah is just insane and my pick for the second funniest scene in the film. Oh my God, the emperor of Fucksville came down from Fucksvlle to give me a pass!

  • Wednesday, December 6, 2017

    10 great uses of songs in movie/TV series trailers

    By Sati. Wednesday, December 6, 2017 , 9 Comments
    This is just off the top of my head and by no meants "Greatest of all Time" kind of list because there are just way too many examples like that to choose from. One of the things I love about trailers is when they use the music to great effect (such as the recent Rampage trailer with awesome use of Smashing Pumpkins' song). We're not talking about the epic trailer music or a well known theme from another film used to great effect (Requiem for a Dream music used in The Two Towers trailer), but just a skillful use of song. Here are some of the examples that came to mind:

    Friday, December 1, 2017

    (315) *grunts softly* + links

    By Sati. Friday, December 1, 2017 33 Comments
  • I cannot stress how bad this week's RF is gonna get.
  • You'll gonna need a shower.
  • And I'm gonna need a lawyer, probably.
  • And we all are going to need an exorcist.

  • Friday, November 24, 2017

    (314) Lock your editing room, my man + links

    By Sati. Friday, November 24, 2017 25 Comments
  • This is gonna be my life until December 21, 2018.
  • And I'm not the only one:

  • Sunday, November 19, 2017

    Justice League

    By Sati. Sunday, November 19, 2017 , , , , , , , 13 Comments

    So here we go, my review of Justice League, list-style.


    Thursday, November 16, 2017

    (313) The Great Flood of Europe + links

    By Sati. Thursday, November 16, 2017 23 Comments
  • This interview is hilarious but this is hands down the best part:
  • I laughed for 5 minutes when this happened. The journalist didn't even direct the question at him but clearly Jason was dreading it and was so done with this preemptively. Well, it serves him right for running around Iceland half naked!

  • Friday, November 10, 2017

    (312) #allin #yourmouth + links

    By Sati. Friday, November 10, 2017 23 Comments
  • The hashtags. Mother of God, the hashtags!  --->
  • I think I actually died and this is coming to you from beyond.
  • Oh good, the interviews for the film have started. This one is hysterical. The interviewer actually has the balls to ask about Weinstein and Affleck is bending over backwards not to look worse than he already looks. And Jason looks like he is literally praying to God for that "joke" not to come up.
  • Affleck really needs to stop talking.
  • And yet he is talking
  • I can't handle this bit! Is he on some sort of mission to kill all women? Well, all women except for Brittani.
  • I need that blooper in my life so bad.
  • Lord, that yawn.
  • That radio interview is audio porn.
  • Corden's show Thursday and Graham Norton's show Friday. Please Graham don't show my tweets on television. Particularly the seahorse one.

  • Friday, November 3, 2017

    (311) Hawaii vs Australia + links

    By Sati. Friday, November 3, 2017 29 Comments
  • Oh my God guys I have so much hotness for you this week. Drink lots of water before you proceed. 
  • Can you guys believe Brittani doesn't find this guy hot? What the hell? 
  • I wish I was that rock he was climbing. I would probably die, but still.
  • Apparently, in Polynesian, the word "momoa" means "dry". That's the most ironic thing I've ever read.
  • Jason, if the popcorn is on you will you also pay for my funeral after I see the film? And for the love of God come here and clear my Internet browser history?
  • He is gonna be on Corden next Thursday so I guess that's gonna be the first time I actually watch that show.
  • Yes, I did rewatch Conan the Barbarian and livetweeted it. 
  • God that was so entertaining. 
  • So very entertaining.

  • Friday, October 27, 2017

    (310) Aqua...boo? + links

    By Sati. Friday, October 27, 2017 28 Comments
  • No Hugh or terrible wig sightings this week. It would be a sad time but you know me, always keeping busy.
  • Great article on Logan. Turns out that 1. James Mangold is working on a script for standalone Laura film 2. The narrative is still where is Patrick Stewart's Oscar nomination? when it's Jackman who should be first and foremost getting mentioned when it comes to awards here so I'm pissed off 3. When asked about it Hugh said he is hoping the part will be recast. 
  • Boo, I need you to stop talking.
  • Meanwhile Hugh, Vera Farmiga and others did the reading of The Princess Bride to aid Puerto Rico. Apparently Hugh kept talking about The Greatest Showman after the thing. I really hope it's at least decent because it's gonna be crushing to see him put so much effort into something only for this to tank. 
  • We know the drill. You show me a hot shirtless dude that also happens to be a nice guy, family man and likes animals and that's it. A good guy who would kill all the bad guys. With his bare hands. That's all it takes.
  • Once again I've fallen through the hole.
  • and I can't. 
  • get. 
  • out.

  • Friday, October 20, 2017

    (309) Welcome back to my good graces, Jason + links

    By Sati. Friday, October 20, 2017 27 Comments
  • Oh, did they give him six candles? Adorbs.
  • Hugh wished Zac Efron happy birthday and shared this adorable BTS photo from The Greatest Showman
  • Hugh still hasn't make a statement about the Weinstein scandal but it's very hard to be mad at him when he tweets things like that
  • I love the fact that it's always Dali LOOKING STRAIGHT AT THE CAMERA.
  • He is being an angel again. In a white shirt.
  • If he is gonna be Pikachu then the universe is clearly fucking with me. Because you know I will watch that thing.
  • Not only is the wig back, now there's also completely insane stare accompanying it:
  • Oh yeah. That's perfect for Pikachu.

  • Saturday, October 14, 2017

    (308) United we stand + links

    By Sati. Saturday, October 14, 2017 21 Comments
  • My wrist hurts today so I'll keep it short.
  • How to be wild by Hugh Jackman.
  • Hugh is in Colombia right now (1,2,3,4,5, 6, 7) which I misspelled as Cambodia on twitter several times this week because clearly I am an idiot who doesn't know where any countries are. 
  • Yeah, I need someone to take car keys away from him.

  • Thursday, October 12, 2017

    Hugh Jackman Appreciation

    By Sati. Thursday, October 12, 2017 17 Comments
    Hugh Michael Jackman
    October 12, 1968 (Sydney, New South Wales, Australia)

    I know every day on my twitter and practically every post here is Hugh Jackman appreciation but today it's even more appreciation because it is the most important day of the year.

    It's boo kangaroo's birthday! IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY, YOU GUYS!

    Friday, October 6, 2017

    (307) Blessed be that troll doll + links

    By Sati. Friday, October 6, 2017 18 Comments
  • Here's Hugh this week. My question is this - why would anyone give him a troll doll? 
  • In any case this is now the most blessed troll doll ever.

  • Tuesday, October 3, 2017

    The Beguiled is a dull, pointless remake and a sad sign of the times

    By Sati. Tuesday, October 3, 2017 , , , , , , , , 27 Comments
    2017
    The Beguiled has been one of my most anticipated movies of the year. The story of young girls and their teachers finding a wounded soldier and taking care of him in isolated school seemed like such a great idea with wonderful potential. My expectations for the movie were even greater since Sofia Coppola won best director award for this film in Cannes. Unfortunately, the film has turned out to be one of the biggest disappointments of the year, Coppola's worst movie and one of the worst remakes I've ever seen.

    Friday, September 29, 2017

    (306) With the claw + links

    By Sati. Friday, September 29, 2017 28 Comments
  • I bet you read the last entry and thought "oh well, there is no way this can get worse".
  • Hold my nettle tea.

  • Wednesday, September 27, 2017

    Thursday, September 21, 2017

    (305) I Hart You + links

    By Sati. Thursday, September 21, 2017 36 Comments
  • Here's boo kangaroo on the set of The Front Runner, that Gary Hart movie directed by Jason "I probably won't give you a hot sex scene with boo boo given what my track record is" Reitman.
  • The wig ain't the best but he is in a suit. I don't even know which place to look at, specifically, it's all so...lovely.
  • That right here is just so much of...man.
  • And he is so big.
  • I'd climb him like a deranged monkey climbs a tree.
  • While drooling...everywhere.
  • Oh, bless this project.
  • This however is not good. The eyebrows and that fringe....is he playing Gary Hart or Tonya Harding? This is not an acceptable wig. If Hugh has to wear one he should always wear Logan one. The queen of wigs of...hotness.
  • (*remembers when he broke that shotgun on his knee*)
  • (*bites lip*)
  • (*blood everywhere*)

  • Friday, September 15, 2017

    (304) Unf**k this mess + links

    By Sati. Friday, September 15, 2017 32 Comments
  • Guillermo Del Toro's The Shape of Water is slowly emerging as our Best Picture Oscar frontrunner this year. The film has just won Golden Lion in Venice. Del Toro is campaigning hard for that Oscar and the great new trailer for the film was just released. "Son, unfuck this mess" is already one of my favorite lines of the year.

  • Tuesday, September 5, 2017

    An announcement

    By Sati. Tuesday, September 5, 2017 15 Comments
    Just a day after what I imagine was my last happy birthday it became clear that the meds are not working on Gustav. He began suffocating again, had hiccups the entire day. The vet told us it will be only more painful for him so couple of hours ago we made the decision and now my beloved friend is sleeping and he is never going to wake up. It's so unfair. He wasn't even 6 years old. He was so smart and sweet and happy. He was always kind to everyone, he never hurt anyone. He was always so happy when I came home from work, he couldn't wait for me to wake up in the mornings and play with him. Every day I gave him a kiss, I held him. This is my life, losing my friend whom I couldn't do more to save a day after my birthday. I keep telling myself that his 5 years and 8 months were happier than longer years of most of dogs out there but it doesn't make what happened less unfair. I feel so angry and alone and most of all heartbroken. I can't write anymore so I'm not sure when there is going to be anything new here. I just can't do this.

    Friday, September 1, 2017

    (303) I am the FBI + links

    By Sati. Friday, September 1, 2017 22 Comments
  • Seriously no Game of Thrones fan during this entire season has felt the joy us Twin Peaks fans felt when Cooper said the above words. I legit stood up and smiled like an idiot.
  • But more on that in a moment.

  • Wednesday, August 30, 2017

    Top 10 performances in Christopher Nolan's movies

    By Sati. Wednesday, August 30, 2017 , , , , , , , , 16 Comments

    Christopher Nolan's movies have given us a lot of wonderful things - exceptional sequences, wonderful cinematography, fantastic music. But most of all they have given us wonderful performances, often times the very best from the talented actors who appeared in Nolan's film's. Here's my list of the 10 best of them.

    Friday, August 25, 2017

    (302) 5 minutes in Heaven + links

    By Sati. Friday, August 25, 2017 24 Comments
  • Well I did watch Butter on Friday and believe it or not it was only marginally less awful than Pan. It took more than 45 minutes for boo boo to show up. Oh but when he did...it was eventful.

  • Friday, August 18, 2017

    (301) Unforgettable indeed + links

    By Sati. Friday, August 18, 2017 20 Comments

  • I know every week I say this is gonna be short and yet I manage to ramble on for so long you guys all need therapy after reading it but this week it's really gonna be short. I'm exhausted since work is crazy, I'm still not OK after what happened at the vet recently and I'm all together a mess. I really think I may have a breakdown soon so it would be nice if nothing else that depresses me happens. Also - and more importantly - Hugh has not gone to the beach this week so there is no new material to perv about.
  • Yep, my tweets have gone poetic again.
  • Here he is being adorable again.
  • And again.
  • Yes, I did rewatch Deception before posting my recent post.
  • I HAVE SEEN THAT THING FIVE TIMES NOW.
  • but anyways...

  • Tuesday, August 15, 2017

    Against the Crowd Blogathon 2017

    By Sati. Tuesday, August 15, 2017 30 Comments

    The last time I participated in Dell's  and KG's Against the Crowd blogathon was 2015 and what do you know, another Edgar Wright movie was my choice back then. The next time he makes a movie I am not seeing it. And if any of you tells me to, I'll punch you in the face.

    WARNING: if you like Baby Driver, Arrival, Amy Adams, Michelle Williams and quality film criticism and are offended by violent sexual imagery, inappropriate jokes and insane ramblings - don't proceed further.

    Friday, August 11, 2017

    (300) mother! + links

    By Sati. Friday, August 11, 2017 27 Comments
  • Me this entire week. And every week until November when this movie finally drops here (I hate this place. This is 2 months after the premiere. I bet by that time it's gonna be online). And if it's good for a long time after that.

  • Friday, August 4, 2017

    (299) Animal Kingdom + links

    By Sati. Friday, August 4, 2017 30 Comments
  • Yep. he went to the beach again. 
  • Not once but twice he fixed his shorts in either an act of mercy or terror. I am not sure which. I can't figure it out beause I AM BUSY WIPING OFF MY OWN DROOL. 

  • Wednesday, August 2, 2017

    (Probably endless) list of things I love about Logan, part 3

    By Sati. Wednesday, August 2, 2017 , , 13 Comments
    (part 1) (part 2)

    136. Logan growling in his sleep, waking up and seeing Laura there, watching him. It's a blessing she wasn't anywhere near him since we all know what happens to women when Logan wakes up near them.

    Sunday, July 30, 2017

    Dunkirk

    By Sati. Sunday, July 30, 2017 , , , , , , , , 28 Comments

    (spoilers!)

    Every Christopher Nolan's movie is an event. In the world were practically every big, spectacular movie out there is a part of a franchise, Nolan is one of the few who still manages to do something unique. And while Dunkirk is yet another huge movie event that surprises, it surprises in more than one way. Nolan often works with complex stories and world building- the magnificent magic tricks he pulls on the audience throughout The Prestige with the film's multiple twists and misdirections, the complex way to unlock the film's mystery rooted in the infliction of protagonist of Memento, the layered world of dreams in Inception - here the story is simple. Soldiers are in need of rescue. Other soldiers and ordinary people are trying to help them. Meanwhile the enemy is trying to kill them all.

    Friday, July 28, 2017

    (298) Comic Con 2017 edition + links

    By Sati. Friday, July 28, 2017 27 Comments
  • The above is the gifset I made this week because of course I did.

  • Monday, July 24, 2017

    (Probably endless) list of things I love about Logan, part 2

    By Sati. Monday, July 24, 2017 , , 20 Comments
    (Part 1 - here)


    74. Logan noticing one of the bad guys and doing this. Oh, good. You're invisible now.


    75..The desperation on Logan's face. He left. Charles and Laura are in danger. He needs to save them.

    Friday, July 21, 2017

    (297) We'll always have those five hours with lions... + links

    By Sati. Friday, July 21, 2017 29 Comments
  • Not one.
  • Not two
  • But three pervy live tweets over the weekend.

  • Sunday, July 16, 2017

    (Probably endless) list of things I love about Logan, part 1

    By Sati. Sunday, July 16, 2017 , , 24 Comments

    6 days ago it has been exactly 4 months since I saw Logan for the very first time. Since that moment I saw the movie 4 more times including once with director's commentary (I have never ever watched anything with commentary before but for this movie I made an exception and it's really a great one - James Mangold shares so much in it and I will cite some of the things I learned from there here). It's July and Logan remains my favorite movie of the year and seeing how it's already in my top 10 of all time - yes, all time - I cannot imagine anything dethroning it.

    So once more, inspired by Alex's brilliant series, - here are the things I loved about James Mangold's masterpiece.

    Friday, July 14, 2017

    (296) The Revenge of the Hole + links

    By Sati. Friday, July 14, 2017 22 Comments
  • For the second time ever we almost didn't have new RF here this week. I had my PC unhooked for 3 days due to my apartment being renovated. But mostly I just felt shitty and didn't have enough of sense of humor and whimsy to turn my life - which I have in a sense a jellyfish has a life - into jokes like I usually do. Not only was my PC unhooked but it's also summer cleanse time so I literally couldn't do anything I like to do or that distracts me. I need to be distracted. All the time. 
  • When I'm not it's not a pretty picture.
  • Think of a combo between Jack Black in Tropic Thunder after the bat stole his heroin, Renton in Transpotting during detox and RDJ in Zodiac answering "no" with bland expression on his face after Jake Gyllenhaal asks him if he is OK.
  • But I did get a bit of a boost when I discovered, as my PC got set up yesterday (and I legit screamed when I saw my boo boo folder again, how I missed it!), that I actually had something in draft saved up from my weekend perving so I just worked from there.
  • This is shorter than usual. But by no means less filthy.

  • Friday, July 7, 2017

    (295) Prepare for the worst + links

    By Sati. Friday, July 7, 2017 31 Comments

  • OF COURSE I made that above gifset. It was the highlight of that movie.

  • Tuesday, July 4, 2017

    "Prisoners" is still so very stupid

    By Sati. Tuesday, July 4, 2017 , , 14 Comments

    (yes, the website is still on hiatus, but my upcoming RF bulletpoint for Prisoners turned into 20-paragraph long rant so yes, we're doing this today)

    There is one thing that fascinates me more than what seems like almost universal love for Denis Villeneuve's 2013's assault on brain cells entitled Prisoners and that is the amount of holes in the story of this film. I can only think of two truly atrocious scripts in the recent memory that dragged otherwise promising and well executed films to the bottom of 'what the fuck?' stupidity - this and Interstellar. And this one may actually be dumber than Matthew McConaughey floating around book shelves in space and coding a watch so that Jessica Eureka Chastain solves physics stuff in the future or past or whenever.

    No, wait. Nope. Nothing is dumber that that.

    I have recently sat through this awfully paced but beautifully shot movie for the third time just to hear Hugh Jackman yell the word "fuck" and look handsome. Don't judge me. At least it allows me to give movies second chances. Or in this film's case second (in March) and third (last Saturday) chance. And in this case proving to me that my initial reaction to it was right on the money.

    Friday, June 30, 2017

    (294) Pass the trapeze, please + links

    By Sati. Friday, June 30, 2017 26 Comments
  • You know that scene in The Devil Wears Prada where Meryl Streep witnesses the dress that was made specifically for her character and she pursues her lips in extreme disapproval? The Greatest Showman trailer - or to be more specific the reactions to that trailer from everyone on this planet who is not so horny for Hugh it clouds all judgment and it's like whatever, if he sat on the crapper for 2 hours and sang "What a Feeling" we would still love it - are that dress. And in that laborious and lovely analogy I'm Meryl Streep. Because I'm thinking come December I'm gonna have to grab a shield and a sword and metaphorically No Man's Land the haters while someone ferociously screams "CRAZY GIRL! NO!' in the background. 

  • Friday, June 23, 2017

    (293) Can God photoshop my life? + links

    By Sati. Friday, June 23, 2017 30 Comments
  • Oh my God. Oh my God this whole video.
  • Well. since you're in good mood now after watching it, I hereby announce that the website and my charming presence in the blogosphere is going on semi-hiatus. I have been running this shit show for 6 years or so and never did this happen in the whole history of this website, but adulting sucks and comes with consequences. That means I'm unfortunately going to be on your websites MUCH less with my wise and super appropriate comments and the only posts here for the next couple of weeks are going to be RFs. I just have too much going on now, the work is insane lately - keep in mind I have a full time job that has nothing to do with movies and is emotionally and - clearly - mentally draining. I wish I could say that this is because I'm hardcore dating (lol) or I'm pregnant (double lol) but no, it's really just because of work. If it slows down, I'll have the time but it's not slowing down at all and it's been like that for several months now. I am exhausted and I really can't keep going like this.

  • Friday, June 16, 2017

    (292) Eat your stupid pancakes and stop moaning! + links

    By Sati. Friday, June 16, 2017 24 Comments
  • So I finally gifed the above from Hugh's last appearance on Jimmy's show back when he was promoting Logan and they played that game where Hugh had to lip read what Jimmy is saying. 

  • Tuesday, June 13, 2017

    Alien: Covenant

    By Sati. Tuesday, June 13, 2017 , , , , , , , 26 Comments
    (spoilers!)

    We need to stop giving the benefit of a doubt to Ridley Scott.

    While the man deserves respect for his two masterpieces - Alien and Blade Runner Scott has now taken the turn that makes it very clear his Alien prequels aren't a thing of passion and certainly not necessity. Why is Scott at 79 years of age set on damaging his masterpiece? (Alien is forever tainted by the existence of the Covenant now). I'm saying this because there is no way anyone can tell me this rehashed, mangled product is the intended movie. This is reactionary.

    Friday, June 9, 2017

    (291) Good girl + links

    By Sati. Friday, June 9, 2017 26 Comments
  •  I gifed the above (it's from The Prestige) because clearly I have no regard for my safety, health and life. And I put the above gif on tumblr because clearly my recklessness applies to those poor thousands of people following me there.

  • Monday, June 5, 2017

    Wonder Woman

    By Sati. Monday, June 5, 2017 , , , , , , 28 Comments
    75 years. That's how long Wonder Woman had to wait for her own movie. 14 years. That's how long the director Patty Jenkins had to wait to do her next film. But now it's finally their time. And with that all the women should cheer - we finally have a CBM movie where it's a woman who is leading, not following.

    And it's wonderful. They should be very proud. We all should be considering the opening weekend box office.